Sunday 5 July 2015

Review: The Third Man

World of Blackout Film Review

The Third Man Poster

The Third Man
Cert: PG / 104 mins / Dir. Carol Reed / Trailer
WoB Rating: 3/7

Phoenix Picturehouse. Arthouse audience, Sunday afternoon. Coughing, sneezing, fidgeting, talking, more badly behaved than the Friday night crowd in a multiplex.

Movie's sound only run through front/centre speakers (ie none of the surrounds) and volume not raised to compensate. Film so quiet that the auditorium's air-conditioning unit was drowning out the dialogue at several points. Combination of low-volume, muffled audio-mix, mumbled dialogue, thick 'foreign' accents and frequently un-subtitled (and untranslated) german dialogue meaning that the intricacies of the plot were borderline impossible to follow. Worst performance from a child-actor of all time. Unable to care about characters or plot. So bored by ferris-wheel sequence that actually started to fall asleep.

Frankly average film 'restored' by someone who hasn't listened to it, and ruined by poor presentation in an establishment which claims to be passionate about cinema.

'All-time classic'?
Fucking treat it like one, then.

Is this film worth paying £10+ to see?
I did, and it wasn't.

Well, I don't like the cinema. Buy it, rent it, or wait for it to be on telly?
TV. Rainy afternoon. BBC2.

Does this film represent the best work of the leading performer(s)?
I hope not.

Does the film achieve what it sets out to do?
I'd say no; many would disagree.

Will I think less of you if we disagree about how good/bad this film is?
I'll ask you to explain yourself, put it that way.

Oh, and is there a Wilhelm Scream in it?
There isn't.

…but what's the Star Wars connection?
The Third Man stars Orson Welles, who lent his vocal cords to Unicron in the 1986 Transformers movie, a film which also starred Corey Burton, the voice of Count Dooku in Star Wars: The Clone Wars.

And if I HAD to put a number on it…

• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
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