Tuesday 3 May 2011

143: Review - Fast & Furious 5

CAUTION: Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.

Fast & Furious 5
03 May 2011. Location: Cinema

Wow. Imagine if a 14yr old boy had a dream (that wasn't about tits), and when he woke up, he mashed that dream together with an episode of Hustle, then hit you round the head with the screenplay for 130 minutes while shouting and blaring bad hip-hop. That's Fast5.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed it greatly, but about half an hour in, I stopped trying to follow any plot and just enjoyed the ride. They go to Rio, run about in them houses on the hillside (like in the second Hulk film), steal some cars, steal some money, fight a bit, hug a bit, and don't even swear because it's a 12A cert. In fact, what amazed me most was that the climactic chase in the film, in which Paul Walker and Vin Diesel drag a 10-ton safe through a city with two cars, seems to involve no civilian casualties (because all the cops are bent, you see, so they're fair game), whilst trashing almost everything else in their path. It's a little like an episode of The A-Team in that regard.

It is great fun, though. Even if they've tried to simplify Diesel's lines so he doesn't have to act, and he still fails. Watch with some mates and some beer for best effect.

(that's a 4 because I'm not really a petrol-head. It doesn't quite qualify a 5 in my book, I'm afraid. You can only coast so far on charm.)

• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.

• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organizations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.

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