I can't believe you've come here to read this and decide whether you should go and see Fast & Furious: Hobbs & Shaw. Even if you've only seen one of these before, you already know where you stand on this. The trailer tells you all you need to know, I promise you.
But still. This paragraph would usually be a brief setup/synopsis, although that's barely needed here. Luke Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) and Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham) are the muscle-bound, chalk-and-cheese odd couple who basically flirt with each other for over two hours. They're up against Brixton (Idris Elba), a cybernetically enhanced mercenary (think The Winter Soldier but with more sarcasm) as he tries to recover a weaponised virus for his mysterious employer. The virus has been stolen by Shaw's sister Hattie (Vanessa Kirby), an MI-6 agent who did this to prevent it falling into the wrong hands (ie Brixton's), and has been helpfully framed for murder as a result. This film is basically an extended fight-scene, albeit one that's way more entertaining than it has any real right to be.
CONTENDER A solid contender for 2020's Academy Award in the 'Screenplay Apparently Written By A 15yr Old' category, there's an action sequence every twelve minutes and industrial amounts of exposition between that really don't matter. With the likes of Helen Mirren, Ryan Reynolds, Eddie Marsan, Rob Delaney and Kevin Hart all straining to get on the cast list for the hell of it, this sequel-baited strand could well turn into the Carry On of action cinema.
What's perhaps most interesting (if that's the correct word), is that after eight full installments the first Fast & Furious spin-off movie is centered around characters who were only introduced in parts five (Johnson) and six (Statham). This alone should tell you that this is an F&F flick in name only, to the point where there's a surprising lack of vehicle chasing going on. In fact, while the main series has always leaned toward high tech when it comes to show-cars, with the voice-activated attack drones, smart-bikes and cybernetic super soldiers on display in Hobbs & Shaw, the series just took the leap into soft sci-fi. It is second only to Hellboy in 2019's chart of cinematic ridiculousness. Yes, it is that daft.
LADY The 12A certificate ensures that this is a largely bloodless affair of course, despite more gun-related deaths than you'd care to count. As a result, the fight scenes have editing with cuts so quick you stand more chance of seeing Jason Statham control his own accent than you would a punch actually landing or a single bullet going in. That said, the script which begins with a reliably grubby "nice tats" line to a female tattoo artist also includes such quips as no fuckin' way, bitch, arsehole, balls and wanker. The 'A' in 12A really does stand for 'advisory' more than ever before*1. Take your 8yr old to this and reap precisely what you sow.
But perhaps best of all, writer Chris Morgan seems to believe there are stretches of road from St Paul's Cathedral in London where you could run for five minutes without being picked up by a single CCTV camera. This might actually be the funniest joke in the whole thing. Although there's another screen-nod to Greggs for the 2019 list, which is also outstanding work.
SO BEAUTIFUL SO RIGHT MY LOVER EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE Fast & Furious: Hobbs & Shaw is good. In places it's even great. Everything you expect and fear it to be*2, it's loud, funny, makes no sense*3 and is indelibly cheesy. Director David Leitch is not going to change your life, and doesn't claim to try. If you're along for the ride, Hobbs & Shaw is great fun, and is not even going to attempt to change your pre-existing opinions, so leave any baggage back in the car park.
But it's also at least half an hour longer than it needs to be*5, and a more cynical reviewer might remark that the it has the absolute gall to evoke the great Rutger Hauer in Blade Runner during Elba's final scene, before the movie limps to a damp squib of an ending.
I couldn't possibly comment…
As much as I enjoyed Hobbs & Shaw, I really can't emphasis enough that it's not a Fast & Furious™ film. This is M:I-Lite with dick-jokes, although it does still carry that slightly unhealthy obsession with Fahh'mly™.
If you're going to see it at all, sure.
The film will lose quite a bit of punch on the journey to the small screen, but if you're a collector of the series then you'll be happy to have it on the shelf all the same.
With the best will in the world, no.
That's entirely possible.
There isn't.
Which, for a movie such as this, is an absolutely unforgivable sin.
Level 1: Well there's a scripted Death Star reference, a Han & Chewie reference, and also Rogue One Vader's in this.
*1 Although credit where it is undeniably due, the 'Michael Oxmaul' routine is a great joke, and while I chuckled more than I'd like to admit throughout Hobbs & Shaw, this was the one gag which caused me to shamelessly guffaw. [ BACK ]
*2 How come Vanessa Kirby's Hattie is an absolute bad-ass up until the point where Hobbs and Shaw have a conversation where Hobbs points out that she's an absolute bad-ass and from then onwards she's just The Girl One? The movie managed to leave behind gratuitous shots of women in swimsuits after the first twenty minutes, and I expected better, frankly. [ BACK ]
*3 All the bad guys' firearms have activator-chips Because Technology.
"We can get the weapons offline for six minutes!" says Hattie.
"Six minutes could be all we need!" says Deckard.
So that'll be why the Samoan gang*4 are squaring off against the goons in bike-leathers in pitch blackness, it kicks off, then all of a sudden it's broad daylight and they're still fighting using fists and sticks and the guns come back online about ten minutes later when they're chasing a helicopter off a cliff? Okay then… [ BACK ]
*4 Don't even ask how Dwayne Johnson's (a notably proud Samoan) screen-family are shown to be living in Samoa when more than half of them are clearly from New Zealand over two thousand miles away. I know they're all Polynesian, that doesn't mean they're all the same for actual fuck's sake… (and yeah, I did a footnote-within-a-footnote for this one. That's how committed I am to calling out lazy casting-racism. I mean when I notice it, admittedly.) [ BACK ]
*5 No really, this is too fucking long for what it is. And if your bladder is strong enough there are three during-credits scenes plus one afterward. I have to be honest and admit that I didn't see the final one as The Need To Pee™ proved greater. Seriously, you know those ones where you realise about halfway through that you should have timed yourself, and then you slowly realise that you realised this when you weren't even halfway through and it's not like you've even been drinking booze and dear god will it ever stop? Oh, just me then. TMI. Okay, as you were... [ BACK ]
DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.
Deadpool 2 (second-pass / SPOILER-FREE)
Cert: 15 / 119 mins / Dir. David Leitch / Trailer
A second-pass of Deadpool 2 in a more sparsely-populated screening proved to be a slightly quieter affair, but certainly no less enjoyable. With around 30 other patrons, the audible joke-reactions seemed fewer*1, but there was also no accounting for how many attendees had seen the film before*2, and repetition is the enemy of reaction-comedy.
But the gags are still funny, the action is still adrenaline-surging, I still teared-up at one point near the end and I believe I’m still justified in calling this movie better than its predecessor*3.
Deadpool 2 is a winner, but guarded threequel speculation begins now....
*1 But certainly sounding more like people watching a comedy than my time with the latest Amy Schumer flick where, (with the exception of one particular patron behind me who laughed like a drain but only for about a quarter of the movie) the crowd looked on in near-silent horror at badly ad-libbed body shaming. [ BACK ]
*2 While I was enjoying a second-pass, one of my erstwhile colleagues for the day was on his eighth. And while his own laughter was some way off the reactions of the opening night crowd, he still sat grinning like an idiot for the duration. Which made at least two of us. [ BACK ]
*3 Well, Ed Skrein isn't in it for a start. [ BACK ]
DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.
Deadpool 2 (first-pass / SPOILER-FREE)
Cert: 15 / 119 mins / Dir. David Leitch / Trailer
Well, I don't know how Fox have done it, but they have. Against all expectation (cynical, hopeful or otherwise) David Leitch's new film is quintessential cinematic alchemy; a sequel which matches and then surpasses its originator without downplaying or dismissing that first movie in the slightest.
Deadpool 2 is even better than Deadpool.
There. I said it.
On this first and very broad pass, it's difficult pinpoint exactly what makes the movie better, since I absolutely loved all of it. Also, I admittedly missed sections by not being able to see the screen for crying (usually through laughter, but at a couple of points just through sheer exuberant joy).
The masterstroke (which is no doubt currently being over-analysed at various production studios) is that tonally, nothing is off the table here. Writers Rhett Reese, Paul Wernick and Ryan Reynolds play with the established X-Men universe (indeed the whole comic book genre) without being beholden to it. The film combines gut-busting humour, sincere warmth and affection, blistering action and the foulest of potty-mouths*1 all with equal vigour. That said, Deadpool 2 is above all else a comedy, and is better for it. When it goes full-on in one area, the whole thing is strengthened as a result.
Reynolds plays the title role to perfection as only he can, with returning appearances from Vanessa (Morena Baccarin), Weasel (TJ Miller), Dopinder (Karan Soni), Blind Al (Leslie Uggams) and Negasonic Teenage Warhead (Brianna Hildebrand) which bring familiarity without repetition. Meanwhile, the 'now featuring' list is headlined by Josh Brolin as Cable, and a tremendously angsty turn from Julian Dennison as Firefist.
Leitch's direction is as tight as the script and as loose as its cast, the eclectic pop/rock soundtrack interspersing Tyler Bates' score with similar fluidity. And while actions in this movie aren't free of consequence, the fourth-wall breaking sets the tone for the screenplay's regard for sticking to the rules. All of which you'd expect, but this is even better, somehow.
About five minutes into the feature it occurred to me that because of the parodic nature of the trailer campaign, I had pretty much no idea what was actually going to happen in the movie. Unless you've already been digging for details, I advise you go into the cinema with the same mindset. Deadpool 2 is a magnificently violent, funny, sweary rollercoaster. Enjoy the ride.
Oh, and there's nothing at the end. Plenty of mid-credits action, but once the names start rolling on the screen, you can make your way out to book your next screening…
*1 There are even a couple of c-bombs, which is unusual for a 15 certificate. They don't necessarily match the flow of the script, but they're used in a way which doesn't de-rail it either. And I only mention this because if That Particular Language is going to be a problem for you, you should know in advance. But by the same token, anyone who's seen the first Deadpool know that this will be a top-end 15... [ BACK ]
DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.
Where better to watch a film about London's grimy old East End than… London's shiny new West End? Don't worry, that's a rhetorical question. Had the gods of cinematic-scheduling been on my side, I'd have seen The Limehouse Golem at West India Quay, less than a mile away from the Limehouse district itself. Indeed, I went there immediately afterward. Instead, I took in this performance from the expensive seats in Leicester Square, safe in the knowledge that I'd have a better class of ruffian to contend with upon leaving the theatre…
Adapted from Peter Ackroyd's novel, the story begins in 1880 as a brutal serial killer works the streets, capturing the attention of the police and imagination of the public. Thrust into the middle of the carnage is Inspector John Kildare (Bill Nighy), assigned what is seen by his superiors as an escalatingly impossible case. Along with his constable, George Flood (Daniel Mays), Kildare's investigation is rapidly drawn to the music halls of the East End, where the killer seemingly had many connections, not least the show-headliner of the era, Dan Leno (Douglas Booth) and upcoming star Lizzie Cree (Olivia Cooke). Not only does Kildare need to unmask the murderer before the next attack, he needs to do so before an innocent is hanged for the crimes…
While the shelf-tag of Victorian Gothic Horror now houses a far wider selection of screen entertainment than it used to, it's nonetheless nice to see it done so well by a director who hails from Florida. Juan Carlos Medina has had plenty of Anglocentric help along with way of course, with Jane Goldman (she of The Woman In Black, among others) screenwriting the Londoner Ackroyd's original tome, as well as a cast who fit their surroundings almost seamlessly. The story itself here is told through intricately layered framing devices which keep the audience on their toes, without becoming needlessly confusing*1. But in terms of the grimy, bloodsoaked atmospherics, Medina gets to lift the award on this one.
The period detail at a visual level is exquisite, although some of the leading characters' social attitudes are conspicuously progressive. That's always a risk in writing for a modern audience, of course. The cast are more of a mixed bag, however. As good as Nighy is in the driving role, I'm not sure he's the best choice for his character. Douglas Booth is theatrically solid enough as Dan Leno, but seems to be playing his role as it if had been written for Johnny Depp (although I'm eternally grateful that it wasn't). And on a more critical note, Olivia Cooke just doesn't display the range her part requires. For the most part, Cooke's dramatic translation of 'stoic fatalism' comes off as boredom*2, like a pound-shop Keira Knightly (yes, exactly). It's probably not too harsh to say that in this particular play, the writing upstages the performance.
All in all, The Limehouse Golem is an entertaining thriller, perhaps more suited to an Autumnal release. There's also the feeling that the story could have had more room to breathe as a four-part TV drama, but at least a run-time of under two hours ramps up the claustrophobia and urgency of Kildare's ghoulish investigation…
Genuine question for those who've seen it: Do all the prints of this film have slightly muffled sound throughout, affecting the spoken Ss and Ts? It wasn't an issue during the ads or trailers so I know it's not the cinema's hardware at fault. It was workable (although definitely noticeable) in the film's quiet scenes, but anything involving background noise meant that most of the dialogue got lost in an auditory blur.
Just wondering because it seems like an odd artistic choice, that's all.
The Prestige, Interview With The Vampire.
It's a bit 'Sunday night TV', but the atmospherics will be amplified in the cinema.
*1 Although it quickly becomes apparent that The Limehouse Golem will be a tale set on a twisty road. Those who smart-arsedly second-guess plot-progresions will have a whale of a time; likewise I'm delighted that they'll essentially be spoiling the ending for themselves. Great work, guys. [ BACK ]
*2 There is perhaps a longer discussion to be had (although this isn't the time or place) about Cooke's character being a celebrated darling of the music hall whilst being emotionally inanimate off-stage. It could well be a deliberate dramatic conceit, although having witnessed her work in Ouija and The Quiet Ones, I'd be inclined to doubt that… [ BACK ]
DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.
Atomic Blonde (vague spoilers in the footnotes)
Cert: 15 / 115 mins / Dir. David Leitch / Trailer
If only the film industry could learn to adapt violent video games for the cinema as well as they do violent comics. I think we'd all be better off.
Working from 2012's The Coldest City, Atomic Blonde follows Charlize Theron as British special agent Lorraine Broughton, assigned by her superior (Toby Jones) to Berlin in November 1989, the week the wall comes down, to track down rogue agent David Percival (James McAvoy) and retrieve a stolen list of operative identities before it's sold to the highest bidder on the international market*1. There will be, as I believe the kids are saying nowadays, scenes...
With a fashionably desaturated colour palette and achingly hipster-friendly late 80s soundtrack, David Leitch's film gets off to a bold, if somewhat clinical, start. True to BBFC form for a 15-rated movie, the blood may not pool on the floor but that's not to say there isn't plenty of it splattered across the walls with dripping, artistic precision. And it's this detached feeling that lingers throughout, making the film almost difficult to like. While the audience will be impressed by what they see, calling it 'fun' almost feels like being complicit in the merciless beatdowns issued by Broughton and Percival. The only smiles to be found in this movie are ones of malice or sarcasm.
And yet, there are wry laughs to be had in Kurt Johnstad's screenplay, dryer than a sandpaper Martini. Theron is amazing as always*2, as is McAvoy. Toby Jones and John Goodman hold the fort in largely 'office-based' roles, and it seems like Sofia Boutella is finally being cast as an actress rather than a gymnast*3.
The story is as twisty-turny as you'd want from this sort of thing, but with few enough characters that it never becomes unnecessarily confusing. And while needle-drop soundtracks have been my bugbear this year, everything chosen here fits the ethos of the film and blends with Tyler Bates' score effortlessly.
But the pièce de résistance has to be that fight sequence. Taking place across three floors of a building, utilising guns, knives, fists and at one point a pair of standard-lamps, producing a quantity of corpses I won't divulge here, and lasting a good six or seven minutes all in a single unbroken shot... I don't know how much they're paying cinematographer Jonathan Sela or the fight-choreography team, but give them a bonus. It's a genuine thrill to watch cinematic precision of this calibre.
Once you get into the rhythm of the film, Atomic Blonde is an absolute visceral joy to watch. But no sequel, no spin-offs, no remakes. You got that, Leitch? Leave this one to bask in its own glory.
Yes, but it should hold up just as well in your living room, provided you don't have noise-sensitive neighbours.
It does.
No, but there's no shame in that with a cast this strong.
I shouldn't think so.
There is.
And there's a boot-shot.
Level 2: James McAvoy and James Faulkner feature in this movie, and they were both in that X-Men: First Class alongside Rose 'Dormé' Byrne.
*1 You're right, that's not entirely unlike 1996's Mission: Impossible, but I'm assuming this is a fairly common trope in spy fiction. No biggie. Besides, this is a great movie and so is Mission: Impossible. [ BACK ]
*2 That said, her 'British' accent is all over the place. The film's final scene almost excuses this as a plot device, but if that's the case then she's the crappest secret agent this side of Austin Powers. [ BACK ]
*3 Although there is one scene which felt distinctly For The Dads, slightly off kilter with the rest of the movie and without sufficient groundwork either before or after to give it the meaning you know is intended. [ BACK ]
DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.
