Review: Strays

Strays
Cert: 15 / 89 mins / Dir. Josh Greenbaum / Trailer

So if 2023 has brought you to the place where you need The Incredible Journey meets The Secret Life Of Pets meets Ted, then director Josh Greenbaum has got you covered. This R-Rated pup comedy does exactly what it says on the tin, in a movie where the dogs saying fuck is the primary joke for an hour and half. It works well enough as a concept, and there are frequent chuckles from Dan Perrault's script but no real guffaws. If that's all you want for an hour and a half, knock yourself out.

In all fairness, the central quartet of characters voiced by Will Ferrell, Jamie Foxx, Isla Fisher and Randall Park is well balanced and reasonably fleshed out. The mix of live-action and CGI is nicely accomplished and the voice-cast is enthusiastic, but at its core the film is tired before it's properly begun. This is third studio-comedy in as many months which feels like a Judd Apatow script that's been found in a drawer after fifteen years and put into production because there was nothing else on the board.

Dick-jokes aside (so many dick-jokes), this movie is actually about the innocence of abandoned dogs, loss, companionship, trust and rising above abusive relationships, so it periodically tries to pull on the heart strings. But Greenbaum doesn't have the sincerity or courage of his convictions to do that properly*¹, and the only real enthusiasm here comes from the shrieking profanity on display in the trailer. Strays just isn't smart enough for the message it thinks it wants to convey and has little to emotionally justify its existence. But the dogs are (largely) real *² here, so it's already head and shoulders above The Meg.

Oh, but I'm taking points off for that accelerated greatest-hits montage of the most Outrageous™ gags just before the finale. If you need to tell your jokes twice to assure an audience they've enjoyed themselves, those weren't good enough the first time...

*¹ And rest assured, I am Dog-People™ and susceptible as fuck to all that. Strays just doesn't have it. ^{[ BACK ]}

*² The main dog is very cool, though. Not Will Ferrell who voices Reggie (obviously) but Sophie, the border terrier who plays him. ^{[ BACK ]}

DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.

Review: The Emoji Movie

The Emoji Movie
Cert: U / 86 mins / Dir. Anthony Leondis / Trailer




































Level 1:







DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.

Review: Chef

Chef (PLOT SPOILERS)
Cert: 15 / 112 mins / Dir. Jon Favreau




Firstly, here are the two new additions to the movie-goer's list of advice, rules and etiquette…

1) Don't go to the cinema straight from work without eating to watch a film which - even to a card-carrying non-foodie like me - contains some admittedly awesome looking sandwiches.

2) If you do have to go to the cinema straight from work without eating to watch a film which contains some admittedly awesome looking sandwiches, try not to sit directly behind the guy with the worst B.O. in living memory, who for some reason places his drink of the floor in the aisle rather than in the cupholder provided, so who spends the film continually reaching down to his side and wafting his essence in a five-foot radius.

Because watching the first one whilst smelling the second makes for a very unsettling two hours.

So, beneath the surface (and really not that far beneath) of Jon Favreau's quirky indie-adventure Chef is a heartfelt, if slightly petulant, swipe at movie critics and even at criticism itself. In fact, it wouldn't be entirely unfair to say that the film barely bothers with this artifice at all, since it deals so directly with the creative parallels between culinary and cinematographic expression, that it may as well just be about a stroppy movie director.

But y'know, if you were going to write, direct and star in a film where the hero throws his toys out of the pram after what in reality is an everyday occurrence, and is then basically adored and supported by all the other characters for the rest of the running time (including his original detractor, embarrassingly), would you really leave in all those ad-libbed exchanges with awkward pauses, not knowing when to cut to another scene, and with you and the stars of Iron Man 2 talking over each other? Because quite frankly, it seems that rather than scolding the critics, Chef just hands them more ammunition.

The annoying part is that the story about the disgruntled sandwich maker, Carl, bonding with his son Percy over the course of the Summer works really well, with Favreau and Emjay Anthony sharing a great chemistry. But that pan's left on the back burner and only stirred occasionally while the main course has no real progression. Carl quits his job to do something more stripped-down and real, then he goes and does it. That's it. There's no third-act obstacle or reveal, everything just goes smoothly and everyone tells him how great he is. Then Oliver Platt's critic, Ramsey Michel turns up to offer Carl a metaphorical hand-job, whereby Favreau's self-penned character shows he has the courage of his convictions by immediately going into business with him. The end.

But the absolute worst moment comes at the end of the film, where we see Jon Favreau smiling, teary-eyed, at a greatest-hits compilation montage of scenes from his own film which we're still watching. And if you think I'm being hard on it, you should read Michael Legge's summary, because while I didn't actively dislike Chef, I also can't disagree with a single word Michael's written, either.

Mr Favreau, if you want to send a snarky fuck-you to the people who've trashed your earlier work, please do it by simply making better films. And I say that as someone who loved Iron Man 2.

Despite its pretensions at both ends of the scale, this film isn't soul food; it's a quick sandwich grabbed from M&S on your way through town. If you thoroughly enjoyed Begin Again, Chef is aimed directly at you.

On the surface, the film features a gourmet chef trying to convince the world that there's spiritual value in fast food. And handily, that's also what the film is about, too.

Almost exactly, yes.



I smirked, but nowhere near enough.



Almost exactly, yes.



Whatever.



I will a bit. Not much, but a bit.



Unlikely.



There is not.

During the scenes set in Little Havana and South Beach in Miami, was I the only Scarface-obsessed viewer waiting for it all to kick the fuck off?

DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
• Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.
• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.