The Curse Of La Llorona
(aka The Curse Of The Weeping Woman)
Cert: 15 / 93 mins / Dir. Michael Chaves / Trailer
New York, 1973. Social worker and single-parent Anna (Linda Cardellini) receives an alert about two young boys being held in apparent captivity at their home before helping them to safety. But relief is short-lived when it turns out their mother was in fact protecting them from La Llorona (Marisol Ramirez), the furious spirit of a Mexican peasant girl who murdered children three hundred years earlier. What she did in life she carries on in death, and now Llorona's attention has been roused, the lady in white has an eye on Anna's offspring…
PRETTY ONE
The sight of Llorona looming sharply into view certainly isn't a pretty one of course, nor is it meant to be. Director Michael Chaves forgoes the classical third-act reveal by using his antagonists's terrifying visage frequently throughout the film, letting the audience know they're not safe from the very beginning.
The basis of our tale here is Mexican folklore. And while these are sensitive times to brandish potential generalisations, the cultural references - certainly when it comes to tackling the demon - are used with a sense of inclusivity rather than belittlement. The Conjuring universe brings Hispanic ghouls to the table in the same way that The Possession did for Hebrew legends.
La Llorona's veil is a twisted parody of both bridal attire and the muslin cloths frequently used to swaddle infants, while her hair-bedraggled face and theme of drowning both manage to borrow motifs from traditional Japanese horror. And much like the classic Ringu, La Llorona's is a curse which can't be outrun by distance once it's set. In keeping with its south-of-the-border roots, the film even manages to throw in a brief homage to From Dusk Till Dawn in the preparation for its final showdown. When the moment arrives, Anna's last-ditch attempt to save her children is worthy of Hammer-era Peter Cushing. This is a film steeped in its genre, a brutal study of PTSD and post-feminist matriarchy which challenges the genre as much as the audience.
MOTOR RUN
The casting here is textbook and Linda Cardellini goes from strength to strength. Having shown she's got a handle on comedy with the Daddy's Home series and held up the more domestic-side of superhero life in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, she now effortlessly turns her hand to horror; not as a threat or shrieking victim, but a saviour and protector-figure.
La Llorona is only connected to the Conjuring universe by means of an incidental character, but is connected all the same, a fitting addition to the macabre family. Scares arrive with dramatic punctuality, Chaves keenly aware that there's no time to drag things out at a lean 93 minutes. He skips the niceties of an extended setup while still respecting the overall form and structure required for a horror movie.
From its first lumbering steps with Bathsheba, through the twisted grimace of Annabelle and on to last year's Valak, the Conjuring series has showcased female antagonists as a contemporary taunt to the testosterone-fuelled slashers of yesteryear in Jason, Freddy, Michael Myers and even Candyman. Although far from pinning the evils of the netherworld on women as a whole, they're more properly possessed by demons here, used as channels and portals, preying upon and amplifying the insecurities of societal expectations.
OFF THE LINE
And that's taken to its logical and horrifying conclusion with La Llorona, challenging the audience's natural instincts to cherish notions of motherhood as the supernatural malevolent force is faced in turn not only by a woman who is a mother, but also a social worker - one who provides care and support to others in times of crisis.
What tragedy has occurred in La Llorona's past that her very soul has turned against the sacred covenant handed down to women since time immemorial, both as a right and responsibility? The more we witness her supernatural crimes first hand, can we develop if not an air of sympathy, then at least understanding? Can some monsters be redeemed, absolved? Should they be? At what point do we as a passive viewer abandon our own humanity in the race to condemn a lack of someone else's?
MY LLORONA*1
Still the film has a playful aspect, as Anna blithely ignores an episode of Scooby Doo playing on the television, a nod to Cardellini's role as Velma in the two live action adaptations of the high-camp spooky comedy. And during the climactic showdown, Anna's son Chris wears a t-shirt bearing the cartoon image of a dinosaur - a symbol of fact and reason against naive superstition, but one that still acknowledges that the past has its place.
Giving Marvel Studios a run for their money, the next Annabelle-led installment of the Conjuring universe is due to his cinemas in under two months' time, so plan your viewing of this accordingly.
I'm only joking, The Curse Of La Llorona is absolute shite from start to finish.
But where's the fun in writing that review again? *2
The Nun*3.
If you liked The Nun you'll enjoy - nay, deserve - La Llorona.
Look, if you've got a tenner burning a hole in your pocket, give me a shout and we'll go for a pint.
If you're going to watch this at all, wait until it hits pre-paid streaming or TV.
Well what do you think?
If we disagree about this you need medical help, not booze.
There isn't.
Level 1: The voice of Atai Molec's in this.
The film's not offensively bad, although fuck me it does try...
*1 Not. Even. Sorry. [ BACK ]
*2 To be absolutely clear, the main body of this review should be taken with a pinch of salt so large that it will induce scurvy before the end of the second paragraph is reached. Although that's not to imply that the comparisons made above have no basis, they're just not intended to be complimentary. The only terrifying thing about this tedious, clockwork bollocks is how it even made it past the pitch-meeting in the first place.
How does La Llorona's premise work, exactly? She killed a couple of kids and felt really guilty about that, which is why she kept killing more children as a means of atonement? Wait, what? She can be summoned from Mexico to New York just on a whim? Presumably she's on-call everywhere? This shit's been going on for three centuries and not once has someone said "have you tried just stabbing her with the crucifix, Terry? In the sternum? I think that's how you do an exorcism". And look at that tagline on the poster. 'She wants your children'. Was that one crafted on a Friday afternoon by any chance? The cast aren't trying here and the writers sure as hell aren't, so why should the audience?
Best line: "Now he's a faith-healer. A shaman who operates of the fringes of religion and science…".
Fucking hell, mate. [ BACK ]
*3 Why did I go so easy on The Nun? It's even more laughably bad than this movie. Must have caught me on a good day, or something? [ BACK ]
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• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.
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