Friday, 31 August 2012

Review: The Possession

CAUTION: Yen's blog contains harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Reader discretion is advised.

The Possession poster

The Possession
91 mins / Dir. Ole Bornedal

I went to see this. It actually made me yearn for Insidious and The Woman in Black.



The Plot: Blah blah, troubled young girl. Blah blah, mysterious box with Hebrew inscriptions. Blah blah, dead insects. Blah blah live insects. Blah blah eyes rolling up in her head while she talks funny / violent incident at school / psychologist. Blah blah the most comedic scene with an MRI scanner ever committed to film. Blah blah demon leaves child and enters father. Blah blah Jewish exorcism. Blah blah more loose ends than a rug made in a GCSE textiles class. Blah blah it's over. But is it really over? NO! IT'S NOT OVER! WOOOOO!

It's based on a true story, alright. The true story of the every other time I saw a film as tedious and predictable as this.

The only thing inherently terrifying about The Possession is Kyra Sedgwick. Natasha Calis, who plays the possessed 'Em' does a reasonable job at long, unnerving stares, but it's a sad day when the best thing about a film is a kid who's not doing anything.

When the final scene closed and the credits appeared on-screen, a ripple of laughter actually went around the cinema. I fucking kid you not.

2/7

Yeah, a 2. Hey; I laughed, at least. Probably more than in Keith Lemon, if I think about it...

DISCLAIMERS:
• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.

• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organisations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.

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